I had a nightmare.
Local governments couldn’t afford to operate hockey rinks in Canada anymore.
Climate change had ensured that no ponds or rivers remained for pick up games.
The U.S economy went kaput pulling us down too. Synthetic backyard rinks, an exciting new phenomenon costing around 50k, grew to be beyond the reach of most Canadians.
And finally, the Toronto Maple Leafs moved to Barcelona and Hamilton’s Copps Coliseum was put up on a very large flatbed and trucked off to Kansas City so the Nashville Predators could relocate there.
Before it gets worse I awake - been reading too many hockey books lately, I guess.
Many of our great writers - Hugh MacLennan, Al Purdy, Morley Callahan, Mordecai Richler, to name just a few, have written on hockey.
Hockey and Ice Hockey
I’ve just finished reading Paul Quarrington’s book King Leary (Anchor Canada, 1987) winner of this year’s CBC Radio Canada Reads award. A funny book about hockey beats out more serious efforts by the likes of Timothy Findley and Mavis Gallant. Recognition of Quarrington’s writing skills or a comment on our national obsession?
I’ve also just completed another older hockey book – David Adams Richards, Hockey Dreams – Memories of a Man Who Couldn’t Play Doubleday, 1996.)
Richards won a Governor General’s award for fiction (Nights Below Station Street) and non-fiction (Lines on the Water: A Fisherman’s Life on the Miramachi). He is a fine Canadian author writer and he is passionate about hockey.
And that is “hockey” not “ice hockey.” Hockey, according to Richards is greater than ice hockey - the later being a European invention.
To Richards’ hockey is “more than a game.” It can be played with a puck and skates on ice. It can be played with a ball and galoshes on the road. Or it can be played with any combination of the aforementioned equipment.
A story illustrates the difference in these two games:
Richards, as an adult, recalls hearing a song by an old black man from Mississippi. The song had been a hit when covered by a white rockabilly singer in the winter of the year much of the action in this book takes place - 1961. This was the year Richards (and your blogger) turned eleven.
But the record company wanted a cleaned up “not so troubling” version of the song.”
“But yes, they could profit from it. They wanted the song. They did not feel they had to tell you where this song came from. They did not feel a need to tell you that it came out of a person’s love of a country and gift of life and tragedy when both have been taken away.”
Think of the original version of the song as hockey; the rockabilly version is ice hockey. Ice hockey was created by those who invent the world for us as they often do. “They legitimize by deligitimizing.”
Childhood Memories
As a child Richards was certain the NHL would expand to Newcastle, New Brunswick. But corporate (i.e., American) interests and the shady international ice hockey community were taking over the game while on his river a friend would be occupied in trying to find a “busted stick in what seemed to be the remotest corner of the country while others were thinking of multi-million dollar television syndication rights.”
Richards’ writing takes me back to my childhood; my own memories of a man (boy) who couldn’t play.
My recollection is that most of us got a chance to play. Some who aspired to stardom got it. Others for reasons I didn’t then understand would never achieve stardom.
Richards’ friend, Michael, lived in difficult circumstances. He wasn’t allowed on the organized team as a result of perceived low social status. It hurt. But on the rink that Michael made and maintained:
“(F)licking the puck at us and smiling as he skated backwards turning on a thin dime and breaking into strides that seemed to swallow the ice – at those times, the hurt wherever it came from, was all gone away, and he was free.”
Much More than a Game
Richards reflects on the famous 1972 Canada/Soviet series:
“It was more than just a game to us. We existed with it, and if it was forgotten then we could not exist without it. Without hockey the country would not exist. Not in the way it should.”
This is a terrific book marred only slightly by a surprising number of spelling mistakes.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Reform the Olympics
The Olympics in Beijing are less than two hundred days away.
That means we are getting closer to that rhapsodic time when every four years our sports media take 3 weeks off from worrying about the Maple Leafs, Blue Jays and Raptors to enlighten us on what we used to call amateur sport.
This usually takes the form of telling us which Canadian is going win which event; various predictions of how may medals “we” will win and; excuses or outrage when one of ours test positive for marijuana before jumping on a snowboard and careening down a mountain.
When the predictions are invariably wrong, the half-baked analysis follows. Let’s face it we don’t really have a chance until we reform the Olympics. Let’s deal with the summer ones.
REAL CANADIAN SPORTS
First, let’s add Canadian type sports. This is a no brainer really. Street Hockey is the obvious one.
But how about Mall Parking Lot Curling - lots of practice facilities on those 360 days of the year when the lots are empty.
Freshwater Sports Fishing could work. We’ve got the “mostest” and the freshest water in the world - for now anyway.
Table Hockey - the old one with the pegs that you use a marble for a puck would be best. I bet we’re the only ones with this model left.
Canadian Football - a game played nowhere else in the world featuring unique teams made up of 19 (non-imports who are usually but not always Canadians) and 14 Americans
A NEW PENTATHLON.
We could also replace quaint old events with equally quaint new events with Canadian content.
The Modern Pentathlon would change to the More Modern Northen Pentathlon.
Fencing would be replaced by Stick Swinging Hockey Fights.
Running by Glow-in-the-Dark Bowling ( 5 pin).
Shooting with Mosquito Extermination.
Equestrian with Log Rolling.
and Swimming by Personal Watercraft Racing.
REPLACE STUPID SPORTS
And let’s get rid of those truly stupid Olympic Sports and replace them with our own inventions.
What a waste of a beach is beach volleyball. Sand Castle Construction will be better.
Synchronised swimming which “we” used to be good at has to go. I’d replace it with Standing Broad Jump and Standing High Jump. (Canadians won medals in these discontiued events a hundred or so years ago. Some kind of conspiracy here, I think.) To save facility costs they could do their jumping on the beach with the sand castle competitions.
And finally the cycling event called Individual Pursuit. That’s the one where they go a couple of laps at walking pace looking backwards and then race like hell for one lap. Replace individual pursuit with Trivial Pursuit.
Now we'll have a chance.
That’s all folks.
That means we are getting closer to that rhapsodic time when every four years our sports media take 3 weeks off from worrying about the Maple Leafs, Blue Jays and Raptors to enlighten us on what we used to call amateur sport.
This usually takes the form of telling us which Canadian is going win which event; various predictions of how may medals “we” will win and; excuses or outrage when one of ours test positive for marijuana before jumping on a snowboard and careening down a mountain.
When the predictions are invariably wrong, the half-baked analysis follows. Let’s face it we don’t really have a chance until we reform the Olympics. Let’s deal with the summer ones.
REAL CANADIAN SPORTS
First, let’s add Canadian type sports. This is a no brainer really. Street Hockey is the obvious one.
But how about Mall Parking Lot Curling - lots of practice facilities on those 360 days of the year when the lots are empty.
Freshwater Sports Fishing could work. We’ve got the “mostest” and the freshest water in the world - for now anyway.
Table Hockey - the old one with the pegs that you use a marble for a puck would be best. I bet we’re the only ones with this model left.
Canadian Football - a game played nowhere else in the world featuring unique teams made up of 19 (non-imports who are usually but not always Canadians) and 14 Americans
A NEW PENTATHLON.
We could also replace quaint old events with equally quaint new events with Canadian content.
The Modern Pentathlon would change to the More Modern Northen Pentathlon.
Fencing would be replaced by Stick Swinging Hockey Fights.
Running by Glow-in-the-Dark Bowling ( 5 pin).
Shooting with Mosquito Extermination.
Equestrian with Log Rolling.
and Swimming by Personal Watercraft Racing.
REPLACE STUPID SPORTS
And let’s get rid of those truly stupid Olympic Sports and replace them with our own inventions.
What a waste of a beach is beach volleyball. Sand Castle Construction will be better.
Synchronised swimming which “we” used to be good at has to go. I’d replace it with Standing Broad Jump and Standing High Jump. (Canadians won medals in these discontiued events a hundred or so years ago. Some kind of conspiracy here, I think.) To save facility costs they could do their jumping on the beach with the sand castle competitions.
And finally the cycling event called Individual Pursuit. That’s the one where they go a couple of laps at walking pace looking backwards and then race like hell for one lap. Replace individual pursuit with Trivial Pursuit.
Now we'll have a chance.
That’s all folks.
Aspirations
When I was a kid, through adolescence and into early adulthood I thought that I ought to quarterback my favourite football team - the Hamilton Tiger Cats.
I didn’t play on a football team and couldn’t throw but that was of little consequence as this was my aspiration.
Later on I thought that I should actually own the Ti-Cats. Money was an issue though. I seldom had enough to buy even a ticket to a pre-season game and if I did have the money I’d have to sneak food in as the price of concessions was beyond my means. Another aspiration.
Now I may have stumbled on something more realistic that meets some need in my male psyche to be in charge of a pro team. So:
A Realistic Aspiration?
I’ve bought an English (soccer) football team.
Well, not actually "bought" that would be a slight fib. I’ve become a member of the Biggelswade United Football Club (http://www.biggleswadeunited.co.uk/).
My membership (about forty bucks Cdn.) allows me to have input on team selection, analysis and voting on each and every issue the club faces. Would you believe Biggleswade members actually selected the starting lineup for their most recent outing a 4 -1 victory over a London team?
Limitations no Barrier
I know little about England but a quick internet search informs me that Biggleswade is a market town of about 15,000 on the River Ivel about 40 miles (60 km) north of Central London and 20 miles (30 km) west-southwest of Cambridge.
I don’t know much about soccer either - or football as I will now call it. That shouldn’t be a problem. They are looking for about 5,000 others like me. The only real requirement is you can afford the fee.
An Interesting Challenge
There is a serious issue here. To quote my club spokesperson:
“The club recognise that surviving in this day and age will take more than goodwill of the hardworking board. In the age of the Internet, the club have embraced the web and have been looking for a way of helping push them further. Essentially, like all clubs, we need a wider fan base, more resource, more input and more funds to push further up the leagues. Our gauntlet to you is this – if you have control of the club, can you make the decisions that will see us to the Conference and beyond?”
(Other teams are doing this. See myfootballclub.co.uk for more background.)
Hedging
One further clarification. There is another small fib herein.
I’m on a thirty day free trial. I haven’t actually put up any money yet. I’m hedging my bets so to speak. You never know when the Ticats might come on the market.
I didn’t play on a football team and couldn’t throw but that was of little consequence as this was my aspiration.
Later on I thought that I should actually own the Ti-Cats. Money was an issue though. I seldom had enough to buy even a ticket to a pre-season game and if I did have the money I’d have to sneak food in as the price of concessions was beyond my means. Another aspiration.
Now I may have stumbled on something more realistic that meets some need in my male psyche to be in charge of a pro team. So:
A Realistic Aspiration?
I’ve bought an English (soccer) football team.
Well, not actually "bought" that would be a slight fib. I’ve become a member of the Biggelswade United Football Club (http://www.biggleswadeunited.co.uk/).
My membership (about forty bucks Cdn.) allows me to have input on team selection, analysis and voting on each and every issue the club faces. Would you believe Biggleswade members actually selected the starting lineup for their most recent outing a 4 -1 victory over a London team?
Limitations no Barrier
I know little about England but a quick internet search informs me that Biggleswade is a market town of about 15,000 on the River Ivel about 40 miles (60 km) north of Central London and 20 miles (30 km) west-southwest of Cambridge.
I don’t know much about soccer either - or football as I will now call it. That shouldn’t be a problem. They are looking for about 5,000 others like me. The only real requirement is you can afford the fee.
An Interesting Challenge
There is a serious issue here. To quote my club spokesperson:
“The club recognise that surviving in this day and age will take more than goodwill of the hardworking board. In the age of the Internet, the club have embraced the web and have been looking for a way of helping push them further. Essentially, like all clubs, we need a wider fan base, more resource, more input and more funds to push further up the leagues. Our gauntlet to you is this – if you have control of the club, can you make the decisions that will see us to the Conference and beyond?”
(Other teams are doing this. See myfootballclub.co.uk for more background.)
Hedging
One further clarification. There is another small fib herein.
I’m on a thirty day free trial. I haven’t actually put up any money yet. I’m hedging my bets so to speak. You never know when the Ticats might come on the market.
Alternatives
Watched (briefly) the New Year's Day Sabres/Penguins “outdoor” hockey game.
It has always seemed to me that the most Canadian of all games should be played or watched outside on a pond or backyard rink or as an alternative in an unheated small town arena where you watch line changes through the mist of your freezing breath.
Let’s face it, that Saturday night version of the game served up by the CBC and dispensed with adolescent beer commercials and the moronic rantings of Don Cherry isn‘t what we imagined as our youthful frozen fingers fumbled awkwardly with skate laces way back when.
Could we have foreseen player lockouts, multi-million dollar annual salaries or the escalation of violence as just "part of the game" that the NHL game has become?
Alternatives
Over the last years I, and many others, have explored options to the NHL. And while they aren’t played on frozen ponds Senior Men‘s (Allan Cup), American Hockey League (AHL) and now defunct National Women's Hockey League Hockey (NWHL) were more accessible as far as price and geography and may have higher entertainment value as well.
Last month I made it out to a women's ice hockey game between the Burlington Barracudas and the Brampton Canadette-Thunder. They play in the new Canadian Women's Hockey League (CWHL). Top stars playing with enthususiam - it was a good game. I'll go again. Women's hockey is worthy of our support.
Some History
The first account of a women's game was in 1891 although it was likely played earlier. A women‘s pro league preceded the male equivalent by eight years. Into the thirties the game was extremely popular attracting huge crowds, producing successful teams like the Preston Rivulettes and well known stars. The game was booming and then the lights went out according to Joanna Avery and Julie Stevens in their book Too Many Men on the Ice - Womens Hockey in North America).
Why?
Getting the ice for games or practice, an issue still, became a bigger problem with the outset of the war as men’s teams came first. The newspapers claimed that it was important to support the men’s game to keep up morale women’s leagues disbanded . Funds for school athletic programs were cut and women ‘s programs took the biggest hit.
But professional (i.e., NHL) control of Canadian hockey was perhaps the biggest obstacle as the amateur game became little more than a junior partner of the NHL unable to even determine the eligibility of its own members or change its own playing rules without NHL approval according to sociologists Richard Gruneau and David Whitson in their 1993 book Hockey Night in Canada.
Of course, one of the biggest barriers to increasing popularity of women’s hockey is the dearth of media coverage. Pick up any daily paper and you'll be hard pressed to find anything at all. This hasn ‘t always been the case. Elizabeth Etue and Megan K. Williams in On the Edge Women Making Hockey History note the pitiful coverage in various media wasn't always the case. And if you think the appalling state of major league men’s sports would force the media to look for something else to write about, you‘d be wrong. Oh, by the way Brampton beat Burlington 4 - 3 in that December 19th CWHL game. You won't find it in the mainstream media but you can find out more about that league at http://www.cwhl.ca/
It has always seemed to me that the most Canadian of all games should be played or watched outside on a pond or backyard rink or as an alternative in an unheated small town arena where you watch line changes through the mist of your freezing breath.
Let’s face it, that Saturday night version of the game served up by the CBC and dispensed with adolescent beer commercials and the moronic rantings of Don Cherry isn‘t what we imagined as our youthful frozen fingers fumbled awkwardly with skate laces way back when.
Could we have foreseen player lockouts, multi-million dollar annual salaries or the escalation of violence as just "part of the game" that the NHL game has become?
Alternatives
Over the last years I, and many others, have explored options to the NHL. And while they aren’t played on frozen ponds Senior Men‘s (Allan Cup), American Hockey League (AHL) and now defunct National Women's Hockey League Hockey (NWHL) were more accessible as far as price and geography and may have higher entertainment value as well.
Last month I made it out to a women's ice hockey game between the Burlington Barracudas and the Brampton Canadette-Thunder. They play in the new Canadian Women's Hockey League (CWHL). Top stars playing with enthususiam - it was a good game. I'll go again. Women's hockey is worthy of our support.
Some History
The first account of a women's game was in 1891 although it was likely played earlier. A women‘s pro league preceded the male equivalent by eight years. Into the thirties the game was extremely popular attracting huge crowds, producing successful teams like the Preston Rivulettes and well known stars. The game was booming and then the lights went out according to Joanna Avery and Julie Stevens in their book Too Many Men on the Ice - Womens Hockey in North America).
Why?
Getting the ice for games or practice, an issue still, became a bigger problem with the outset of the war as men’s teams came first. The newspapers claimed that it was important to support the men’s game to keep up morale women’s leagues disbanded . Funds for school athletic programs were cut and women ‘s programs took the biggest hit.
But professional (i.e., NHL) control of Canadian hockey was perhaps the biggest obstacle as the amateur game became little more than a junior partner of the NHL unable to even determine the eligibility of its own members or change its own playing rules without NHL approval according to sociologists Richard Gruneau and David Whitson in their 1993 book Hockey Night in Canada.
Of course, one of the biggest barriers to increasing popularity of women’s hockey is the dearth of media coverage. Pick up any daily paper and you'll be hard pressed to find anything at all. This hasn ‘t always been the case. Elizabeth Etue and Megan K. Williams in On the Edge Women Making Hockey History note the pitiful coverage in various media wasn't always the case. And if you think the appalling state of major league men’s sports would force the media to look for something else to write about, you‘d be wrong. Oh, by the way Brampton beat Burlington 4 - 3 in that December 19th CWHL game. You won't find it in the mainstream media but you can find out more about that league at http://www.cwhl.ca/
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